Don't Screw Up!

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So proud! — The Game Master has insulted more than 1 000 000 players!

I don't know what makes them so bad, but it really works!

WARNING: This game could insult your intelligence, providing you have some.

Let me show you a minimalistic game «Don`t screw up!». Whether you are looking for something serious or just want to kill some time by tap and swipe, this game is simple and addictive from the very first minute. Want to play? First, let me tell you something.

Do you think you can handle mocking and cruelty? Want to play nasty or want to play nice? It’s your choice. I’m just the moderator, a real sweet-pea, an occasionally cranky game-minder, a vicious, teeth-baring attack-dog… neatly rolled into one. Let`s play the text game.

The rules of engagement are simple. I tell you to ‘tap’ and you ‘tap’ your screen. I tell you to ‘drag’, ‘pause’, ‘count to 10 and tap again’, ‘swipe’ or ‘wait’… whatever I say, you follow my written instructions and we’ll get along fine. Screw up, and I’ll be tapping you. Just as hard as you can take it!

Beat your top score, savage your friends’ scores and no one will call you a ‘yellow-bellied lizard’ again. But you really need to focus, as I’m also a bit chatty, encouraging you, if not disparaging you, at every turn.

Fair warning: ‘Don’t Screw Up!’ will pulverize a fragile ego, whether you score well or not. I can say really dirty words, I can tell whatever I want. Sometimes my insults are funny, but only for me. It is not easy, you have to focus and do not yawn. Want a stupid tap game? Look around for something else. This game is for fast and sharp ones. And one more thing. Do not start if you don`t want to shake up. Please, wrap yourself in several layers of thick skin and wear a helmet before entering the play.