How to Win Friends & Influence

How to Win Friends and Influence People

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The Principles

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Part 1: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1. Principle 1: Don’t criticize, condemn or complain

2. Principle 2: Give honest and sincere appreciation

3. Principle 3: Arouse in the other person an eager want

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Part 2: Six Ways to Make People Like You

1. Principle 1: Become genuinely interested in other people

2. Principle 2: Smile

3. Principle 3: Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

4. Principle 4: Be a good listener

5. Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

6. Principle 6: Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely

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Part 3: How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1. Principle 1: The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it

2. Principle 2: Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”

3. Principle 3: If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically

4. Principle 4: Begin in a friendly way

5. Principle 5: Get the other person saying, “yes, yes” immediately

6. Principle 6: Let the other person do a great deal of the talking

7. Principle 7: Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers

8. Principle 8: Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view

9. Principle 9: Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires

10. Principle 10: Appeal to the nobler motives

11. Principle 11: Dramatize your ideas

12. Principle 12: Throw down a challenge

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Part 4: Be a Leader—How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Rousing Resentment

1. Principle 1: Begin with praise and honest appreciation

2. Principle 2: Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly

3. Principle 3: Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person

4. Principle 4: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders

5. Principle 5: Let the other person save face

6. Principle 6: Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”

7. Principle 7: Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to

8. Principle 8: Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct

9. Principle 9: Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest